Random whining

So...
This post is dedicated to all the people who have been wondering why I haven't been posting anything in March. I have jot down a few experiences out of the ones I have had in the past month and done with them what I do best: whine... It's ok I love my life and I know I don't have a rough one either: in fact I'm grateful for everything I have. However, I am writing my whinings here in the hope that my experience might be useful little advices (or things to think about) to some readers.

Reminder: Please remember that no one is forcing you to read all my points so stop reading as soon as it gets to be too much whining for you in one go.

• Group interviews: BEWARE of them. I hope one day it will be a banned practise. You are in a room with other people who are applying for the same job as you. At the same time, you have to BOTH be nice to them and engage with them AND compete. It is, I believe, very inhumane. And generally sad. And at the end of it you have schizophrenic thoughts like "Well, what a nice bunch of people...oh I hope I get the job...oh what a lovely person good luck to her...oh no maybe not?!?"

• Ryanair's terravision bus from London Victoria: where does it leave from? Yes, I've also been travelling a lot this past month and I've had to do it in the middle of the night, as the takeoff time of the plane was around 6AM. Buses from Victoria leave regularly at night, making it possible for the sleepless ones to get to the airport on time. However, the Ryanair buses leave from 2 different bays...and online or on the ticket you print at home there isn't a way to find out from which bay the bus leaves. I suggest you go to the Terravision Cafe' (which is in between the 2 bays) and you ask the person to give you the little leaflet where the buses that leave from bay 2 are highlighted in blue. Or follow the blog and I'll take a pic of my leaflet soon so you can find it here.

• NHS, some help please? Recently I've felt my knee funny and dull pain. To sum up, after having been twice to two different healthcare practices and after following their advice (i.e. "take ibuprofen, put some ice and keep it elevated but you can walk just don't put too much weight on it") none of the nurses or the doctors I have seen has done further analysis on it. My knee  started to swell and properly hurt, nevermind the discomfort. I now know it is a problem with my patella and they didn't discover it at all and never helped me to find a specialist that would. And that is nothing: a friend of mine was in pain, called an ambulance and they asked her 3 times the same kind of information. All they were worried about was where she was living, not how she was feeling. She was left sitting on a chair, somewhere just like that. I mean, come on NHS! I've found a few nice receptionists and nurses but really, the majority of the people that has seen me haven't been helpful. :(

Can you relate to any of the points above?

Do you have something to moan about?

Comment below!

De Amoribus

This blog post is a late bloomer.
I know the dreaded Valentine's day has come and gone...but I really wanted to share my thoughts when I could organise them in my head as this is a broad, lengthy and sentimental topic.



I want to write about love and the different kinds of love.
Needless to say, loads has been said about this topic already.

However, I wanted to talk about love in light of the recent developments in Italy (the political elections), Pope Benedict's decision of retiring, Valentine's day, the British Parliament's recent decision on same-sex marriage and my own recent reflections.

Did you know that "De Amore" was the title of an essay written by Andrea Cappellano published (a long time ago) in three books? I didn't. What is funny though is that apparently in the first and second book he describes extramarital love and in the last book he tries to basically almost deny all the theories. After all, it was the 12th century...
Maybe one day I'll actually read the essay and will let you know more about it.

In any case, love is definitely a hard concept to grasp. St Paul helps us to understand what true love is in the letter to the Corinthians:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.⁸ Love never fails.

How hard is that to achieve...and how contradictory it is to many of the "loves" we encounter in real life! We definitely should strive towards it.

One characteristic of a less pure but maybe more worldly love is definitely that "helplessness" we might feel when, no matter how mean a person is to us...no matter how much they don't respect us and no matter how much they actively choose to appear and disappear from our lives in a random way...we still love them.

Is this the kind of "helplessness" that homosexual feel? Is it the same kind of falling in love?
As a heterosexual, I've been thinking about this many times. I think before even starting to argue about whether we think they should be able to marry or not...we should take a step back and agree on something: they have the civic right to love one another. Whether we are religious or not...I think we should see them first of all as human beings, and as such, they have the right to love. Anyone they want.
Then the many discrepant theories arise...should their unions be called "marriages" or not?

Why are there homosexuals in the world?
I've heard someone saying that something is just and moral if everybody in the world can do it and people wouldn't be hurt by it. Well, homosexuals definitely do not harm everyone...but if everyone would be homosexual the world would struggle to procreate. It is important to point out that this theory takes for granted the fact that being homosexual is a choice...when many times people feel it's not.
However, I've also heard someone else say: "I think homosexuals were sent by God to help the overpopulation problem and the orphaned children in need of adoption".
I think they are both valid arguments...I do prefer the latter though... :) I thought it was a very sweet thought, given that I believe in the fact that we are all in this world exactly how we are for different purposes.
Maybe a new Pope would re-consider this modern matter on love?

In any case, there's love that makes one eccentric, love that makes one alternative, love that destroys, love that makes you go crazy, love that saves. It's so astonishing how one single sentiment (though not a simple feeling) can spark so many hearts in so many different but equal ways. Because at the end of the day, we can all relate to the consequent feelings love brings.

And in the end, when we feel helpless, I think all we should do is recognise its power. Its majestic, stubborn qualities. And we should surrender to it.
'Cause...what else is there to do? Thankfully, St. Paul's true love only has positive consequences.
So if your heart wants to love that person no matter what, we have to let it (in the right way).
What's the worst that can happen? Only that that person is loved.

I think True Love is the positive force that builds...it never destroys.
In a broader sense...the more we love, the more we want to love others.
And even when we think the love we build towards someone in specific is futile or invisible: it still matters. Haven't figured out how exactly...but I'm sure of it.

A story that never gets old...

While looking into the files of my computer I saw a story I wrote  a while ago (some years have passed). It was about a girl who would leave everything, rebel and move. Reality meets fantasy.
I guess some stories never do get old and some feelings come back.
You feel like you are experiencing something for the first time, but maybe what changes is only the way in which you go through it, not the feeling itself.
In any case, here's some excerpts of the story.

"A time, a specific moment in the life of a person, reveals that reality is not a dream. This moment: frustration and sadness. It is in that instant that the human being understands how few the chances of getting everything dreamt in those night of fine sleep are. Even she experienced this moment, this unbelievable instant. Even she, the childish girl that never wanted to grow up. She…finally understood that it’s hard to make your dreams come true and it’s hard to see the world this way. Now, she remembers everything: the facts, the memories, everything…and she saw, how blind she became. She was living in a dream, not in reality: in a fantastic world where she could always fix what she had done. Aisling was sitting in her bed, not moving, thinking hardly. She couldn’t believe it. She always thought everything could be fixed. This time, there was no one helping her. No one. If she wouldn’t sustain herself, there was no one to help her out. Yes, I’ll leave she thought. There is no other way. I must take my responsibility.

Leaving was not a simple thing. She had to abandon all her hopes, all her dreams for maybe something that wouldn’t give stability, security. But she had to do it.While packing, tears fell from her eyes; soft tears that spoke of truth. She stared at the wall, full of pictures: her dad, her mom, her grandmother…she knew she could possibly never come back. She quickly left a note and forced herself out. She didn’t even look one last time at the house, at her room still full of old remembrances, security but not of happiness.

As she hurried down through the street, she couldn’t even believe she was leaving forever everything. She passed the church, the deli, the shop. As she crossed the street, the flower her friend gave her broke and fell, the stem still in her hands.She looked at it for what it seemed like an eternity to her. Then she picked it up and, arrived at the other end of the street, she threw it in the garbage can and continued her journey. It is now summer again, and two summers have passed by since her leaving. After all this time she understood: one can never, ever...even begin to end to find oneself."